There is a certain type of person. They are the kind that asks complicated questions about simple things without ever knowing what they mean. They conflate sounding smart with being wise. Despite the veneer of their ersatz expertise, I like to say these people know just enough to be dangerous.1 What do I mean?
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When I was five, I wandered into the ocean surf with my wallet in my bathing suit pocket. That Velcro wallet contained my life savings, two twenty-dollar bills. After tossing around in the waves with my father for some time, I slowly realized I had lost my wallet. I say “slowly realized” because as a five-year old I did not readily accept that my wallet was lost. I insisted on searching the ocean. I was going to find wallet. My father kindly played along. We searched for an eternity comprised of what was surely no more than ten minutes.
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